Binge drinking. Photograph: Matt Cardy/Getty Images

Gordon Brown can relax, now that true essence of "Britishness" has been discovered. Traveller's bible Lonely Planet has solved the conundrum, revealing that the British are addicted to fast food and porn and possessed by an ever-growing obsession with celebrity, a quality bestowed on those with the "ability to sing a jolly tune, look good in tight trousers or kick a ball in the right direction". The guide also points to the "telling indictment that more people vote in TV talent shows than for their country's leaders".

Oh and we drink too much.

It's harsh but is it true? How would you describe the British to holiday makers?