Michelle Pauli 

Whose novels would you like to be in?

Michelle Pauli: Entering a writer's imaginative world is one thing, but how about getting them to name a character after you
  
  


How much would you pay to appear in a Frederick Forsyth novel? Fans of the bestselling thriller writer had better give their piggy banks a good jiggle – the minimum bid in an auction to name a character in his next book has been set at £990. It hasn't been reached yet, despite the auction running since May, but bidders have until 1 September to give their name to a character who, says Forsyth excitedly, "will definitely 'be a goodie rather than a baddie', representing the forces of law and order!"

It's all in a good cause (Leonard Cheshire Disability, to be precise) but arch-Conservative and Europhobe Forsyth's books probably wouldn't be the first ones I'd want to appear in. Three years ago the American free speech campaign group, The First Amendment Project, brought together a stellar cast of writers willing to auction the rights to name characters in their upcoming novels. They included John Grisham, Lemony Snicket, Dave Eggers, Chuck Palahniuk and – my top choice – Neil Gaiman, who offered the chance to have your name on a gravestone in The Graveyard Book. That could be fun.

Stephen King offered "One (and only one) character name in a novel called Cell ... Buyer should be aware that Cell is a violent piece of work, which comes complete with zombies set in motion by bad cellphone signals that destroy the human brain. Like cheap whisky, it's very nasty and extremely satisfying. Character can be male or female, but a buyer who wants to die must in this case be female. In any case, I'll require physical description of auction winner, including any nickname."

The romantic in me wonders if it would be possible to Japan-ise a name to fit into a Murakami novel, while it might be a hoot to give a name to a character in a Jilly Cooper romp. Which author would you like to name a character after you?

 

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